Page 6 - ADU Voice Volume 4 Issue 1
P. 6

6   voice    · FALL 2024                                                                                                                                                                                  FALL 2024 ·   voice 02
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                                                                                                                                                                                     of our distracted reach will do wonders for you!
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                                                                                                                                f t that unfold with every breath, descending grace-    o f  o ur  di s t rac t e d  r e ac h  w i l l  do  w o n der s  f o r  y o u!
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                                                                                                                                fully  from  our  creator.  Remember,  the  most
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                   T   ame the P                    ain of Nostalgia                                                            important thing in the world is your well-being;           Finally, dissipate any bitterness about the past by
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                   Tame the Pain of Nostalgia
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                                                                                                                                                                                     allowing God’s wisdom and grace to peek through
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                                                                                                                                let go of anything that threatens or jeopardizes it.
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                                                                                                                                                                                     that imaginary keyhole which adorns the door of
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                                                                                                                                                                                     your psyche, illuminating all your confidence, posi-
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                                                                                                                                In addition, try to see the world around you from    y o ur  psy c h e ,  i l l umin a t in g  a l l  y o ur  co nfiden ce ,  p osi -
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                                  WRITTEN BY LYAN ISAM MUSHREF (1080322)                                                        t the perspective of your future self; as peculiar as     t tivity, and optimism. This, perhaps most powerfully,
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                                                                                                                                                                                     will unlock all the wonderful possibilities expanding
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                                                                                                                                i it is, this technique will allow you to acknowledge   w i l l  un lo c k  a l l  t h e  w o n der f u l  p os si b i li t ies  exp a n din g
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                                                            Furthermore, let us not forget the mere sliver of
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       Nostalgia is a very heartwarming yet bittersweet
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       N os t a lg i a  i s  a  v er y  h e a r twa r min g  y et  b i t t er sw e et    F ur t h er m o r e ,  let  u s  n o t  f o r g et  t h e  m er e  s li v er  o f    t the subtle tides of beauty that roll unnoticed along   in endless reach along your personal horizon. Being
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       emotion; it includes beautiful sentiments such as     human nature in our souls that tends to under-es- -                your shore, such as people who you may have taken     a t  p e ace  w i t h  t h e  p a s t,  w e  w i l l  fin d  o ur  h o r iz o n s
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                                                                                                                                                                                     at peace with the past, we will find our horizons
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       warmth, safety, and even excitement. Yet there is one     t timate fleeting beauty due to the desire to not be           for granted, views you may have avoided paying       b r o adenin g,  b r ig h t l y  a n d  p r i s t in e l y ,  en a b lin g  t h e
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       facet of nostalgia that adds a sad and poignant tinge
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                                                                                                                                                                                     chance for a better future.
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       facet  o f  n os t a lg i a  t h a t  add s  a  s ad  a n d  p o ig n a n t  t in g e    overly “dramatic”, a tendency that increases with age.            a t t e n t i o n   t o ,   a n d   o p p o r t u ni t ie s   t o w a r d s  w h i c h    c h a n ce f o r a b et t er f u t ur e .
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                                                                                                                                attention  to,  and  opportunities  towards  which
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       t to the whole emotive landscape: regret. The question                                                                   y o u  m a y  h a v e  n o t  s t r et c h e d  y o ur  h a n d  en o ug h.
                       t
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                                                                                                                                you may have not stretched your hand enough.
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       t that poses itself is: “How can we look back at precious     We will need to address every single reason to come
                                                                         t
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                                                    cio
                                     lo
                                                                                                r
       memories and moments without feeling regretful
                                                            up with a comprehensive solution to this maladap-
                                                                                                                                In addition, try to dedicate a portion of your day —
       m em o r ies  a n d  m o m en ts  w i t h o u t  f e e lin g  r eg r et f u l   u p  w i t h  a  co m p r e h en si v e  s o l u t io n  t o  t hi s  m a l ad a p -  I n  addi t io n,  t r y  t o  de dic a t e  a  p o r t io n  o f  y o ur  d a y  —
                                                                                   a.
       over opportunities that we missed, or not appreci-
       o v er  o p p o r t uni t ies  t h a t  w e  mi s s e d ,  o r  n o t  a p p r e ci -  t tive version of nostalgia. When it comes to anxiety,   s a y  a n  h o ur  —  t o  a p p r e ci a t in g  a  ra n do m  a s p e c t  o f
                                                                                  i
                                                                                     W
                                                                                         en
                                                                                              co
                                                                    sio
                                                                                                                                say an hour — to appreciating a random aspect of
                                                                        o
                                                                                                m
                                                                       n
                                                                                                        nxiety
                                                               e
                                                                                                              ,
                                                              v
                                                             i
                                                                                            t
                                                                  er
                                                                                            i
                                                                 v
                                                                          f
                                                                                       h
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                                                                               a
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                                                                                         sin
                                                                                                                                  ur
                                                                                                    ty
                                                                                            g
                                                                                                             a
                                                                                                        u
                                                                                        a
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                                                                                      s
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                                                                                                                                                          r
                                                                                                                                                           ien
                                                                                                                                                                                d
                                                               e
                                                                                                                                                         f
                                                             h
                                                      g?
                              hi
                                                    in
                                                            t
                                                        ”
                                                                                                                                                              d
                                                                s
                                                                     t
                          h
                                                                                                                                                    b
                        ug
                                                                                                                                                   t
                                                                     io
                                                                                                                                                      e
                                                                 o
                                                                                                                                                       a
                                                                   u
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                                        w
                                                                                                                                                                          ’
                                      y
                                                                                                                                                                       v
                                         er
                                                                                                                                                                        en
                                  t
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                                   h
                                                                                                                                                                          t
                                                                                                                                                                             a
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                                           e
                                                                                                                                                                               le
                                                                                                                                                                  u
                                                 ur
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                                                   r
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                                                                                                                                                                    h
                                                                                                                                                  i
             t
                                                                              es
           g
         in
                                                                                                                                         w
              hin
                                                                                                                                              h
                                                                            m
                                                                                                                                           h
                                                                                                                                            et
       a
                                                                                   t
       ating things enough while they were occurring?”        the solution comes not as a single entity but as a                your life, whether it be a friend you haven’t called
                                                                                     a
                                                                                                                                     lif
                                                                                 n
                                                                                                                                        ,
                                                                                  o
                                                                                                                                       e
        t
                    en
                      o
                 gs
                                                                                                                                                er
                                                                         co
                                                                       n
                                                                                              t
                                                                                                          a
                                                            collection, which comprises maintaining a healthy                   for a while, or a movie/ series you have mysteri-
                                                                                                         e
                                                                                                                                                                      v
                                                                     n,
                                                                                m
                                                                                                                                                                    h
                                                                                                                                f
                                                                                                           l
                                                                                                                                       hi
                                                                                         m
                                                                                                                                                                              er
                                                                                                                                                                     a
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                                                                                                                                                                           ys
                                                                                                                                     w
                                                                                                       h
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                                                                                     i
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                                                                                    r
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                                                                                                                                                                                 -
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                                                                 c
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                                                                                                                                           ,
                                                                                            in
                                                                   io
                                                                                                            h
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                                                                                                                                                                                 g
                                                                                                      ce
                                                                                                     n
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                                                                                                                                                d
                                                                                                                                                 ,
                                                                                                                                              e
                                                                                                                                 u
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                                                                                                                                                   r
                                                                                                                                             n
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                                                                                                                                    y
                                                                                                                                      a
                                                                                                                                           do
                                                                                                                                  s
                                                                                                                                        a
                                                                                                                                         n
                                                                                                                                                                      p
                                                                                                                                                                       e
                                                                                                                                                                     p
                                                                                                          diet,
                                                                                                                                                                          p
                                                                                                                                                                            l
                                                                                                        d
                                                                                                                                                                        d
                                                                                                                                                                   o
                                                                                                                                                           e
                                                                                                                                                             y
                                                                                                                                                       ga
                                                                                                                                                         m
                                                                                                                                                                  s
                                                                                                                                                                   t
                                                                                                                                                              o
                                                                                                                                                                u
                                                                       ra
                                                                     (p
                                                                  le
                                                                                           in
                                                                          in
                                                                         y
                                                            lif
                                                                                               a
                                                                                                 b
                                                                                             g
                                                                ty
                                                               es
                                                                                   a
                                                                                  l
                                                                                       ,
                                                                                      y
                                                                                     l
                                                                                    r
                                                                                         a
                                                                            g
                                                                                          t
                                                                               egu
                                                                                        e
                                                                              r
       There is a plethora of ways in which we can mini-
                                                                                                  a
       Th er e  i s  a  p let h o ra  o f  wa ys  in  w hic h  w e  c a n  mini -  lifestyle (praying regularly, eating a balanced diet,   ously abandoned, or a game you stopped playing
                                                                                                                                                       un
                   n
                      p
                     d
                et
                                                                                                                                                   ad
                                                                                                                                                      s
                  a
                                                                                                                                                          k
                                                     b
                                                      ac
                         inf
                                                                                                                                                               e
                                                                                                                                                             en
                        a
                                                            exercising regularly, and sleeping well), consulting
                                                        k
                                                                                                                                                            b
                                                                                                                                                  h
                                                                                                                                 s
                                                                                                                                        p
                                                                                                                                           r
                                                                                                                                         o
       miz
                                                                                                                                  i
                                                                                                                                   ts
       mize regret and painful yearning while looking back     ex er ci sin g  r egu l a r l y ,  a n d  s le ep in g  w e l l),  co n s u l t in g   as its importance had sunk beneath the weight of
                                                                                                                                     im
                                                                                                                                              n
             eg
                                                                                                                                               ce
               r
                                                                                                                                            a
                                                                                                                                            t
                                                                                                                                a
            r
           e
                                                                                                                                                                        w
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                           u
                                                                                                                                                                          eig
                                       w
                                           le
                                                                                                                                                                    t
                                               o
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                                             lo
                                                                                                                                                                                o
                               e
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                                                                                                                                                                                 f
                             l
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                                  nin
                                     g
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                                                                                                                                                                              t
                                 r
                                                   g
                                                                                                                                                                 a
                                                k
                                                                                                                                                                  h
                                                                                                                                                                  t
                                                 in
                                                                                                                                                                           o
                                                                                                                                          w
                                                                                        emic

                                                                             p
                                                                                                                                                             ur
                                                                                                                                y
                                                                                                                                            o
                                                                                                                                                                        y
                                                                                                                                              s.
                                                                                                  s
                                                                                                                                                                  er
                                                                          f
                                                                           o
                                                                            r
                                                                                                                                                                          t
                                                                                                                                             e
                                                                                                                                                            o

                                                                                    le
                                                                                                     ps,

                                                                                                                                  u
                                                                                  b
                                                                                                                                     ad
                                                                                                   h
                                                                                                                                   r
                                                                                                                                                                e
                                                                                                        let
                                                                                      c
                                                                                                                                         t
                                                                                                                                 o
                                                                                                                                                                 v
                                                                               os
       at precious memories. Note that I used the word
                                                                                                                                        l
                                                                                                                                       u
                                                                                               mi
       a t  p r e cio u s  m em o r ies.  N o t e  t h a t  I  u s e d  t h e  w o r d    a psychiatrist for possible chemical mishaps, letting     your adult woes. Setting an hour every day to
                                                                                 si
                                                                                       h

                                                                                                                                                   t
                                                                                              l
                                                            a
                                                                                                                                                   t
                                                                      r
                                                                     t
                                                                                                           t
                                                                    a
                                                                                             a

                                                                                                           in
                                                                                                                                                      g
                                                                 c
                                                                                                                                                    in
                                                                                                                                                                      d
                                                                  hi
                                                                                                                                                  e
                                                                        s
                                                                                                                                                                       a
                                                              psy
                                                                                                             g
                                                                         t

                                                                                                                                                           h
                                                                                                                                                S
                                                                                                                                                                    y
                                                                                                                                                         n
                                                                       i
                                                                                                    a
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                                                                                                                                                      din
                                                                 f
                                                                                                                                                                t
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                                                                                                                                                             t
                                                                                                                                             e
                                                                                                                                           h
                                                                      b
                                                                             b
                                                                                                                                              s
                                                                          h
                                                                                                                                               ur
                                                                            a
                                                                       ad
                                                                                                                                                  r
                                                                                                                                                    un
                                                                                                                                                               a
                                                                   h
                                                                               t
                                                                  t
                                                                                o
                                                                                                                                         e
                                                                                                                                                             h
                                                                                                                                           t
                                                                              i
                                                                    e
       “ minimiz e ”  —  n o t  “ e limin a t e ”  —  b e c a u s e  i t  i s  p a r t   go of the bad habit of perfectionism (learning and   appreciate the surroundings that
       “minimize” — not “eliminate” — because it is part
                                                                                                           a
                                                                                             sm
                                                                                                                                 p
                                                                                        c
                                                                                                                                  p
                                                                                       e
                                                                                                     r
                                                                                                 (le
                                                                                                             d
                                                                                          io
                                                                                                      nin
                                                                                           ni
                                                                                                    a
                                                                                                                                a
                                                                                                         g
                                                                                                            n
                                                                                         t
                                                                                      f
                                                                                                                                   r
                                               t
                                                              rac
                                                                  icin
             fa
                 ic
                                     ce
                                                                                                                                    li
                                                                        o
                                                                                                                                           wa
                                                                                                          g
                                                                                                                                r
                                                                                                                                          a
                                                                       t
                                                                                                                                 o
                                                                                                        a
                r
                                                                                                                                                  o
                                                                                                  o
                                                                                        e
                                                                                              l
                                                hin
                                  ien
         t
                                                                          accep
          h
                                          mi
                                                                                           s
                                                                                                                                              v
                                                                                                      m
                                                                                                                                               es
                                                       n
                                             s
                     h
                                                                                             a
                                                                                                              s
                                                                                                                                                    t
                                        t
                                                                                          i
                                                                                                a
                                                        d
                   o
                                                                                                   u
       of the fabric of human experience to miss things and     practicing to accept that life is all about margins             roll like sea waves out
                                              s
       o
                                                                                                            in
                                        o
                                er
                                                                                                                                        s
                    f
                             exp
                                                                                                     t
                       um
                                                                                    a
           e
                                                                                              l
                                                                                                                                  l
                                                                      g
        f
                                                                                  h
               b
                                                                                                                                      e
                                                                                 t
                           n
                                                                                                                                                   u
                                                   gs
                                                                                t
                          a
                                                                                                                                  l
                                                                                                         r
                                                                 t
                                                     a
                                                                                      lif
                                                                                                                                     k
                                                                                                                                         e
                                                                                                 b
                                                            p
                                                                                     t
            ad
                                                       t
                                           did
                                                      a
           s
                                        w
                                                   e
                     t
                           e
        e
          l
                                         e
                 o
                                t
                                                            of error, from the moment we were delivered to
                                                 p
                             en
                    t
                b
                                                        e
                                                p
                                  o
                      h
                                   ug
                                      h
                       em
                                                  r
               a
                  u
                            v
                                               a
         e
       f feel sad about them even though we did appreciate   o f  er r o r ,  f r o m  t h e  m o m en t  w e  w er e  de li v er e d  t o
                                 h
                                                    ci
                 e
                                                 g
                                              ein
                                                      h
                                                  in
                                                     t
               t
                h
                                 c
                                                        t
                                                            life till our last breath and embracing imperfec-
                    u
                                  a
                   f
             t
         em
                              ur
                        t
             o
                     l
                      les
                           f
                            o
                          o
        h
                                   p
                                      i
                                       li
                                                       a
                                     b
       t them to the fullest of our capabilities being in that   lif e  t i l l  o ur  l a s t  b r e a t h  a n d  em b racin g  im p er f e c -
                                            b
                                         ies
                                        t
                                    a
                                                                                                          t
                                                               n
                                                             io
                                                       s
                                                                                                         u
               t.
            en
                                                                                                  era
                                                     s
                                                                                                            s),
                                                                    lif
                                                                  in
                                                            t
                                                                                                           h
                                                     i
                                                                                              g
                                                        o
                                um
                                                                               t
       m
                                                                                       l
                                                                                e
                                                                                                     l
                                    a
         o
                                     n
                                                                                        s
                                                                              u
       moment. This is part of human nature, and it is so   tion in life’s minute details and general truths),
                    s
                        p
                         a
                                                                                      i
                     i
                                                                                     a
                      s
                            o
                              f
                               h
                          r
                           t
                                                                                  det
                                                                        ’
                                               n
                 Thi
                                             ,
                                              a
                                                                        s
                                                                                            d
                                                                                                        r
                                                   i
                                                   t
                                                                                               en
                                                 d
                                                                       e
                                         t
                                          ur
                                            e
                                                                                           n
                                                                                          a
                                       n
                                        a
                                                                                                       t
                                                                          min
          m
       inherent within us that it would be ludicrous to
                                                              v
                                                                                                         h
       in h er en t  w i t hin  u s  t h a t  i t  w o u ld  b e  l udicr o u s  t o    avoiding mentally allotting too much weight to
                                                                                                     w
                                                                                                      eig
                                                            a
                                                                                              m
                                                                                                uc
                                                                                                  h
                                                                        en
                                                                             l
                                                                                          t
                                                                           t
                                                                                                           t
                                                                                          o
                                                                            a
                                                                idin
                                                                                                             o
                                                                                            o
                                                                                    t
                                                                                                            t
                                                                                        g
                                                                                  lo
                                                               o
                                                                                 l
                                                                                      in
                                                                                     t
                                                                    g
                                                                      m
                                                                                a
                                                                              y
                                                                             l
                                                            life’s little problems and trying to see the big pic-
       eliminate it completely. However, the important
       e limin a t e  i t  co m p let e l y .  H o w e v er ,  t h e  im p o r t a n t    lif e ’ s  li t t le  p r o b lem s  a n d  t r y in g  t o  s e e  t h e  b ig  p ic -
                   w
                                     hi
                                                   r
                                                                             d
                                                                                                            i
                                                                     e
                                                                                        s
                                                                               a
                                                                                                     c
                                                                                         u
            i
                                    t
                                   e
                                                   eg
                                         e
          t
                                                                          a
                                         f
                                                                                                a
                                              g
                                           e
                                            lin
                                                                                                              t
                                                                                            in
                                                                         ,
                                                                                           t
                                                                      ad
                                       s
                                                o
                                                 f
                                                                                                        o
                                                                                                             s
                                                                                                  psy
                                                                           n
                                                                                                      h
                w
         r
                                                                                          l
                                                                                                         log
                       a
                                                                                              g
                                                                                  o
                                                                    s
                                                            t
                                                                e
            s
                    e
                                                                 in
                        n
                                                                                 s
                                                                                    co
                      c
                                                                                      n
        a
              h
                          minimiz
                                                                     t
                                                      r
                                                             ur
       part is how we can minimize this feeling of regret. et.           ture instead, and also consulting a psychologist
               o
       p
                                                                                l
                                                                 t
                                                            f
                                                             o
                                                                           h
                                                                                     p
                                                                          t
                                                               r
                                                            for  therapy,  the  most  prominent  of  which  for
                                                                       y
                                                                                      r
                                                                        ,
                                                                                                             r
                                                                                   t
                                                                                os
                                                                   era
                                                                                       o
                                                                      p
                                                                                               t
                                                                              m
                                                                                            en
                                                                                                            o
                                                                                        min
                                                                                                 o
                                                                 h
                                                                            e
                                                                                                         h
                                                                                                           f
                                                                                                      hic
                                                                                                    w
                                                                                                  f
       Firstly, we will need to decipher the reasons behind
                                                                            ni
                                                                               i
                                                                                        v
                                                                               v
                                                                                     h
                                                                                           ra
                                                                                                      y
                                                                                                    p
                                                                                                 era
                                                                                 e
                                                                                    e
                                                                                         io
                                                                                  B
       F ir s t l y ,  w e  w i l l  n e e d  t o  de ci p h er  t h e  r e a s o n s  b e hin d   anxiety is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, which
                                                                                       a
                                                                              t
                                                                         og
                                                                                                             h
                                                                     i
                                                              nxiety
                                                                       C
                                                                      s
                                                                                                          hic
                                                                                                        w
                                                                                                       ,
                                                                                             l
                                                            a
                                                                                               Th
                                                 f
                           a
                                                                               t
                                                                                                 le
                                                                       n
                                                                                                         ni
         e
                                                        g
                                                                a
                                                                            r
                                                                                                            v
                                     b
                                                  le
                                                                                                           t
                                                                     o
                                                                              c
                                                    et
                    p
                                                                                                     cog
                             io
                                  o
                                                                  e
       t
        h
                                                                                               a
                                                                 s
                                                                             e
                            t
                                   f
                                                                                  g
                                                                                        t
                                                                                in
                                                                                                    “
                                             u
                                          t
                                                             s
                                         u
                                                                                                             e
                                                                                      h
                                                                         co
                                                                                       a
                                                                                                l
                               n
                                                                                              c
                  -a
                     p
            un
                                           if
                                                                                           r
                                                                   d
       the  under-appreciation  of  beautiful,  fleeting     i is based on correcting what are called “cognitive
                                        a
                                                                                            e
                                                                                                            i
                                                      in
                                       e
                                                                                          a
                         ci
                                                               b
                                               ,
                                                                           r
                                              l
                       r
               der
                        e
                                                                                    w
                                                                                                  d
       m o m e n t s.   A ft er   a   p e r io d  o f  t h o ug h t f u l   c o n s id -  di s t o r t io n s ”  (in co r r e c t  a n d  in acc ura t e  p a t t er n s
       moments. After a period of thoughtful consid-
                                                            distortions”  (incorrect  and  inaccurate  patterns
                                                               t
                                                            o
                                                                                     o
                                                                    k
       eration,  there  comes  to  mind  various  reasons,
                                                              f
                                                                                  e
                                                                                       r
                                                                                                           g
                                                                                              d
                                                                                    w
                                                                                h
                                                                hin
                                                                                                     t
                                                                          b
                                                                                                             a
                                                                                                m
                                                                     in
                                                                         a
                                                                              t
                                                                                                       inin
                                                                                                   in
                                                                       g
                                                                                                      a
                                                                             u
                                                                           o
                                                                                t
                                                                                                  a
                                                                                           a
       era t io n,  t h er e  co m es  t o   min d  va r io u s  r e a s o n s,    of thinking about the world) and maintaining a
                                                                                            n
                                                                                        ld)
       including, but not limited to, anxiety about our past
                                                            healthy state between our thoughts, actions, as
       in c l udin g,  b u t  n o t  limi t e d  t o ,  a nxiety  a b o u t  o ur  p a s t    h e a l t h y  s t a t e  b etw e en  o ur  t h o ug h ts,  ac t io n s,  a s
                       er
          t
                                            o
                                       p
                                                            well as emotions, which are all interconnected.
                     i
                  e
                                              v
                                          s
                      t
                                           t,
                                               er
          h
              u
                       t
                                         a
                                                 -a
               t
                            s
                                 u
                                                        s
                                   t
                                                    a
                                                     l
                              a
                                                      ysi
                               b
                                o
        r
                    b
                                      e
                                                   n
             f
                         n
       or the future, bitterness about the past, over-analysis     w e l l  a s  em o t io n s,  w hic h  a r e  a l l  in t er co nn e c t e d .
       o
                           es
                                     h
            e
                                    t
                   ,
                ur
       (w hic h m a y le ad t o w h a t i s l a b e l le d
       (which may lead to what is labelled
                                                                                                  es
                                                                                                        l
                                                                                               t
                                                                                                        l
                                                                                                            n
                                                                      e
                                                                                                       i
                                                                           v
                                                                          o
                                                                        a
                                                                         b
                                                                                              a
                                                               l
                                                                                              i
                                                                  f
                                                                                             t
                                                                 o
                                                                                                          co
                                                                    h
                                                            All of the abovementioned initiatives will con-   -
                                                                    t
                                                            Al
                                                                                        d
                                                                                                     w
                                                                             em
                                                                                   io
                                                                                en
                                                                                                 v
                                                                                     n
                                                                                                i
                                                                                          ini
                                                                                       e
                                                                                  t
                                                                                  g
            ra
                                                                  t
       a
       as paralysis analysis), perfectionism, and setting too     t tribute  to  managing  anxiety,  helping  us  to
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       high a standard on ourselves and our environment.     a p p r e ci a t e   t h e   b e a u t i f u l   m e m o r i e s  a n d   m o m e n t s
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